Me, Myself and a crazy fucking elf named Earl

I was out hiking this morning and found out that I suffer from multiple personality dissorder. An elf named Earl told me so. I found him behind a burning bush, it was a fullsize papermodel of George W. Bush actually.

Anyway, I kicked the elf so hard that his dinner came out of his ears. I thought I had injured him at an "cosmic asskicking"-level.

But it turned out he was fine. He took a spoon and spooned up what was left of his dinner and started to cook a meal over the flames of the burning bush.

He served me the best meal I've ever had.